April and Eric (Photo)

Categories: Dating, Pen Pals, Friends: Success Stories
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Submitted by: Nannette | View Member Profile | View Other Posts
Created: 3/11/2003

My story, finding my mate on ChristianSinglesDating.com:
He Turned My Sorrows into Dancing…..

When I married my high school sweetheart in 1992, I never thought I would end up standing in a courtroom filing for divorce on the grounds of adultery while pregnant and caring for my three year old daughter. I was only 28 and facing a life of uncertainty, fear, doubt and dismay. My pregnancy was greatly affected by the stress of my husband’s affair and I nearly lost the baby. Bedridden, on many different medications, my daughter to care for and without a job, I couldn’t believe what was happening to me. “Why God?” and “How am I to survive this?” was all I could say.

I prayed. I cried. I prayed some more. Most times, I didn’t even know how to pray. My prayers were more like desperate pleas to be rescued. Yet through the months of bed rest, court papers and shock, my basic needs continued to be met. My family rallied around me and cared for my daughter, Alaine, and I. I had virtually no income and yet we had food on the table each day. My unborn child had only a 50% chance of survival, yet the doctors continued to be amazed at the progress of each week.

And on one emotionally tragic night, my son was born. And born healthy. Austin was born out of great pain, stress, sorrow and anguish. And yet his eyes were filled with joy. Pure joy. It was God’s blessing to me… Austin was the heart of God poured out. He comforted me like I never thought possible.

Each day and night thereafter was filled with joyful moments and hurtful reminders. Though I’d tried to reconcile with my husband, he had chosen to continue his relationship with the other woman. Our life together was over.

When Austin was just a few weeks old, I received a call from a colleague. They informed me that Columbiana Centre, the area’s largest shopping mall, was interested in hiring me as the marketing manager. I was ecstatic. Though still recovering from the birth of my son and the traumatic end to my marriage, I interviewed and was immediately hired. It was God’s first step to getting my life back together.

With my world in shambles, my new position gave me not just the means to take care of myself and my two young children, it gave me confidence. God was showing me that He was in control. And for the first time in my life, I was giving myself over to his plan openly and unconditionally.

I sold the home I had shared with my ex-husband and bought another. God blessed me with a new home convenient to my children’s child care center. I sold my aging car and God blessed me with a minivan. The kids and I were settling into our new life.

A year and a half after the struggle began, I was looking for the support of other believers. I was still yearning for answers to what God’s plan was for me. I had grown thankful for my experiences because I could see how my faith was being strengthened and how I was growing as a believer. Yet, I was still grieving over my loss. Not able to get out much as a single working mother, I turned to several Christian websites for information and the affirmation from others who had gone through similar circumstances. One person in particular reached out to me. His name was Eric Thomas, and I met him on ChristianSinglesDating.com.

We began corresponding as we shared the similar circumstances of divorce due to unfaithful spouses. He lived in Florida and I in South Carolina. We emailed. We talked on the phone. It was like we had known each other forever but had been separated for a long while. It was amazing.

Then totally out of character for each of us, he said, “I want to come see you.” And even I was amazed that I said, “Ok.” And just like that he drove to see me only seven days after we met. We both felt God had brought us together and we were nervous yet anxious for God’s will to be revealed to us. Needless to say however, I didn’t tell my mom I was meeting a guy I met on the internet! She would have thought I’d lost my mind! It was bad enough I was afraid I’d done just that.

But the day Eric walked up my front door steps for the first time, I knew I’d marry him.

From that day, the love Eric and I shared deepened. That first weekend was almost magical. We couldn’t believe how God had brought us together and how the pieces of our lives were being picked up and something great and wonderful was being crafted. Our faith grew as we thought about our lives together. There was just one thing… I lived in South Carolina and he lived in Florida.

Now it wasn’t that neither of us wanted to move. We were both bound by circumstances that weren’t easily changed at least not by us alone. Even though I had sole custody of my two children, I was still bound by a visitation schedule with my ex-husband that would prevent me from moving out of state. I would need the court’s permission to do so and I was required to have significant circumstances to make the request, i.e. job opportunity, family ties, remarriage. One of these alone would probably not be good enough for the courts to justify allowing me to move. My entire family was in South Carolina and I had a good job.

And then Eric had circumstances keeping him in Florida. His two children were there and he had a great job with the State of Florida. Fifteen years into his retirement was hard to give up. We knew from the beginning that only God could bring us together. We didn’t know how, when or where, but only that it would happen.

For the next year, we saw each other at least once a month. God always seemed to make that possible. Each goodbye was more unbearable. We talked every day sometimes until the wee hours of the morning. We supported and strengthened each other. Some days we felt “wow, look what God has done with our lives. He has brought us together when both of us were so hopeless about our circumstances.” Other days we found ourselves frustrated at being apart and wondering again “Why?”

That year was tough. We were so happy when together. We understood each other. I never felt about anyone the way I felt about Eric. And he felt the same way about me. We just kept our eyes on God and tried to be patient.

Then in September 2002, a little over a year since we first met, Eric noticed that General Growth Properties (my employer) had an opening for a Senior Marketing Manager in Lakeland, Florida – his home. I inquired about the position and my company was so excited I was interested that they offered me the job over the phone immediately. Not only was the position in Eric’s city, it meant a pay raise of over $15,000!

WOW. God’s plan was in action.

I flew to Florida to see the malls I would be managing. Eric and I could hardly believe our dream was coming true. We looked at houses, schools, etc. Then Eric proposed. I said yes before he could even finish asking…..

From the moment I was offered the position, I began talking with an attorney. Accepting the position was contingent on the court’s approval for me to move with the children. Knowing I was in for a fight, I approached my ex-husband and mentioned my promotion and subsequent move. He was furious and an ugly court battle began. But I tried to remain strong in my faith and so did Eric.

During a hearing, my ex-husband and I presented our affidavits. Mine stated why I should be able to move, that I was the children’s primary caregiver, that I had a job opportunity and that I wished to remarry. He asked for custody of the children and for a court order preventing the move. The judge took our information into advisement. Little did we know that would mean an entire agonizing month waiting for the judge’s decision.

We felt we not only had a good case, but that this was God’s plan for us. Moving wasn’t going to be easy for me. I had lived in South Carolina minutes from my parents my entire life. I was nervous about relocating. Yet, I had grown so much over the past few years understanding that I had to trust God. I desired His will in my life. Eric and I were both committed to walking on faith and giving ourselves over to the Lord. As we waited for the court’s decision, we asked for patience, strength and guidance. We asked that we be taught how to forgive those who seemingly stood in our way. We prayed for wisdom for the judge. And most of all we prayed that our lives and our situation would be used to glorify Him.

On November 26, 2002, 28 days since our court appearance, we received the word we’d been anxiously awaiting. The court had granted me permission to move with my children. Our prayers had been answered.

Eric and I were married on January 3, 2003. The children and I moved to Florida a week later and I began my new job as well as my new life.

When everyone and everything stood against us, man said, “How will you ever be together?” God’s power and mercy said “I can do anything.” God took us, two people with broken hearts and shattered lives living in different parts of the country seemingly bound by their circumstances, and brought us together to His glory. He turned our sorrows into dancing.

God has placed it on our hearts that we are to tell our story from the rooftops! Our story is to be a light unto others. I pray that you are touched by it and may you be blessed in your walk.

April Gilchrist Thomas